In Memoriam: Transgender Day of Remembrance
Days of remembrance are often confused with days of celebration. Events like Pride, International Transgender Day of Visibility, or Trans Awareness week are wonderful spaces for festivities and honor.
However, Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR) is not a celebration; we are remembering the lives we have lost to hatred, violence, and oppression. This year we also remember those we’ve lost due to the disproportionate rates of COVID-19 hitting the trans community.
In 1999, Gwendolyn Ann Smith created TDOR to honor the memory of Rita Hester, a well-known member of the trans community. She is one of many trans women of color who we have lost to hate crime, and whose murder goes unsolved.
This year we lost 48 people in the US; 48 people with friends, family, ambitions, and dreams just like you. Most of these people were trans women of color and/or indigenous Trans women. The chances for a young black trans woman to be murdered is 1 in 2,600.
Gender minorities are at a significantly higher risk for hate crimes, discrimination, death, and suicide. Just for being brave and strong enough to be their true selves.
This awful number, 48, is not even the true number. It is far higher, but many deaths are unreported or misreported. The issues in reporting are founded in and exacerbated by the fear of police, manipulation by law enforcement, lack of competency in institutions for recording and reporting death, families, and media.
Far too often, the burden of advocacy and education falls on our marginalized communities. Today is a hard day, and the emotional weight of teaching others about Trans Day of Remembrance is not for the trans community to bear.
That is why it is important to share that today's blog is written by allies at Modern Path, a small trans-owned business. We want to give space to those whose focus today will be on their own grief, loss, and remembrance.
In honoring this day, we want to share about each of the people that we lost this year. Not about how they passed or when they passed, but something to share about their person. Who and what they liked and loved. What made them happy. What they were passionate about. There is more to their life than their death.
With Love and Respect,
Karen & Kahlor (on behalf of Modern Path)
Trigger Warning has been used on other sites for violence and murder.
Mia Green
A close friend of Mia shared, “Her smile was so perfect and so contagious. She made me laugh.” [source]
Gia Valentina Romualdo Rodríguez
Gia worked with outreach groups like Make the Road New York and Colectivo Intercultural Transgrediendo. [source]
Shelley Lynn Rose
Shelley was a talented artist and a singer with the voice of an angel. [source]
Aja Raquell Rhone-Spears ("Rocky Rhone")
Aja was incredibly close to her family and loved cooking. She called out instances of racial injustice and advocated for a world free from white supremacy. [source]
Tiffany Harris ("Dior H Ova")
Tiffany loved fashion and shared on social media her career as a personal shopper and photos with luxury fashion brands that she loved. [source]
Angela Martinez Gómez
Angela was an indigenous Muxe identity person from Oaxaca, Mexico and a dedicated employee. [source]
Bree Black
Bree worked at Ralph Lauren and enjoyed OMG games on social media. [source]
Draya McCarty
Draya had an infectious smile and a big heart. [source]
Merci Mack
Merci liked baking cookies at home and loved relaxing in the jacuzzi. [source]
Brayla Stone
Brayla was known as someone who always held space for others to be themselves and express their identities. [source]
Riah Milton
Riah worked as a home health aide and was a loving sister and aunt. [source]
Selena Reyes-Hernandez
Selena loved to celebrate birthdays, and had recently attended a birthday party in Chicago. [source]
Jayne Thompson
Jayne is remembered by her friends as an “amazing person” who “...was very thoroughly loved and cared for.” [source]
Nina Pop
Nina was well known in her area, and friends describe her as “always happy.” [source]
Henrietta Robinson
Henrietta was known as both ‘Grand Lady’ and ‘Mother of Miami Beach. [source]
Lorena Borjas
Lorena helped transgender women in Queens contend with human trafficking, health issues and possible deportation. [source]
Monica Diamond
Monica was the co-owner and founder of Ncphyne Promotion Company LLC, an event promotion company. [source]
Camila María Concepción
Camila was a writer for the Netflix shows "Daybreak" and "Gentefied.” [source]
Dustin Parker
Dustin was a taxi driver, LGBTQ+ activist, husband, and father. [source]
Alice Carter ("Baby Alice")
Alice loved wearing pink, composing poetry and of course McDonald’s strawberry milkshakes. [source]
Nikki Kuhnhausen
Nikki was known for being tough and sticking up for others. [source]
Christine Zephier
Christine was active on Facebook, and like to share videos with her friends. [source]
Aerrion Burnett
Aerrion's friends described her as a Barbie and a goddess and "if you wanted to have a good day, you need to smile, Aerrion was the person you wanted by your side.” [source]
Isabella Mia Lofton
Isabella was kind to others despite enduring adversity throughout her life. [source]
Elie Che
Elie was a poet, a dancer, a friend and an inspiration to many. [source]
Kee Sam
Kee was an aunt, loved dogs, and enjoyed sharing pictures of gorgeous nails and hair styles on social media. [source]
Queasha Hardy
Queasha was a stylist who operated a popular hair salon in Baton Rouge. [source]
Marilyn Monroe Cazares
Marilyn loved Marilyn Monroe, Cardi B, and Nicki Minaj, and "rocking crazy outfits, crazy wigs." [source]
Summer Taylor
Summer worked at Urban Animal, a veterinary clinic. [source]
Shaki Peters
Shaki was a performance artist and community organizer. [source]
Tatiana Hall
Tatiana was affectionately called a "diva,” who had “the prettiest smile” and “just liked to have fun." [source]
Brian Powers ("Eagle")
Brian enjoyed cooking, old movies, and meeting new people. [source]
Dominique "Rem'mie" Fells
Dominique was a dancer and artist, and was making plans to go back to school with dreams of being a fashion designer. [source]
Name Unknown
A young Black trans woman. [source]
Tony McDade
Tony enjoyed playing basketball, boxing, and cooking vegetarian food. [source]
Helle Jae O’Regan
Helle was happy and proud to be herself. [source]
Johanna Metzger
Johanna knew how to play mutliple instruments. [source]
Ashley Moore
Ashley was a writer and believed in hard work. [source]
Lexi "Ebony" Sutton
Lexi loved poetry, makeup, and fashion. [source]
John Scott Devore/Scottlyn Kelly Devore
John/Scottlyn was praised by friends for being great at styling hair. [source]
Alex McCray
Alex was majoring in social work at Fontbonne University in St. Louis. [source]
Mia Penny
Mia like to wear colorful eyeshadow and had dimple piercings. [source]
Yahira Nesby
Yahira was a ballroom dancer and a member of the House of Chanel. [source]
Angel Rose Garcia
Advocates from No Justice No Pride, Trans-Latinx DMV, and They/Them Collective all worked hard to get help in finding Angel. [source]
Brianna “BB” Hill
BB was a big fan of the Kansas City football team. [source]
Daphne Dorman
Daphne was a San Francisco-based transgender activist, comedian, and actress who Dave Chappelle referenced in a recent Netflix special. [source]
Corbin Ray Bach
Corbin was a U.S. Army Medic and in civilian life a Corrections Officer for the state of Kentucky. [source]
To learn more about TDoR, check out these resources:
https://unerased.mic.com/unerased/
As an ally, what can I do to help?
Support organizations and resources specifically for gender minorities and that are trans-led:
Trans Housing Coalition (THC) - “A trans-led and founded organization that began as a photography and grassroots crowdfunding project (The Homeless Black Trans Women Fund) aimed at getting chronically homeless Black Trans women off the streets. THC utilizes a housing first, person-centered approach to get Trans folks into permanent, affirmative housing.” https://www.transhousingcoalition.org/
TRANScending Barriers - “A trans-led grassroots 501c3 non-profit organization that serves the transgender and gender non-conforming community in Georgia.” This includes programs that assist in name and gender marker change, re-entry transitional support, and case management and peer support groups. https://www.transcendingbarriersatl.org/
Trans LifeLine - “A grassroots hotline and microgrants 501(c)(3) non-profit organization offering direct emotional and financial support to trans people in crisis - for the trans community, by the trans community.” This includes a peer support hotline run by and for trans people and a microgrants program to assist in legal name changes and updating IDs to be gender affirming. https://translifeline.org/
Trans Women of Color Collective- “A grass-roots global initiative led by trans and gender non-conforming people of color that works to uplift the lived narratives, experiences and leadership of trans and gender non-conforming people of color, their families and comrades while building towards collective liberation for all oppressed people through healing and restorative justice.” https://www.twocc.us/
Continue your education on today’s purpose through learning more:
“Remembering Our Dead” | https://tdor.translivesmatter.info/
“Transrespect versus Transphobia Worldwide’s Trans Murder Monitoring Project | https://transrespect.org/en/trans-murder-monitoring/
Human Rights Campaign created “A National Epidemic: Fatal Anti-Transgender Violence in America in 2019” which contains information and statistics about anti-transgender violence, shares the stories of many transgender people who were murdered in 2019, and what you can do about it. | https://www.hrc.org/resources/a-national-epidemic-fatal-anti-trans-violence-in-the-united-states-in-2019
Engage in advocacy and social justice efforts:
Join PFLAG National’s special PFLAG Connects meeting: A virtual vigil in honor of Transgender Day of Remembrance on Friday, November 20th at 8pm ET/5pm PT. https://pflag.org/blog/transgender-day-remembrance-2020
Get involved with the Anti-Violence Project (AVP) through donating, volunteering, and reporting anti-LGBTG violence. https://avp.org/
Volunteer with Transgender Law Center’s Legal Resistance Network as a way to support the community as a lawyer, or their Community Resistance Network, which requires no legal experience, to support their legal help desk. https://transgenderlawcenter.org/
Share what you are learning to increase awareness, connect others to resources, and create social justice.
70% of US adults do not know someone who is transgender. We step forward and stand with you all as we memorialize those we have lost.
Statistic from: https://www.pewforum.org/2016/09/28/5-vast-majority-of-americans-know-someone-who-is-gay-fewer-know-someone-who-is-transgender/